"Indeed, if we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospel, it would seem that our Lord finds our desires, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drinks and ambitions when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. " -C. S. Lewis

somehow that speaks to me.. I guess I really have to zoom out of my current situation, and zoom in more on God..